


Of Proposals and Identities

by CJ_fics



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, marriage proposals, olicity - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-25
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-03-03 12:10:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2850407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CJ_fics/pseuds/CJ_fics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver asks Felicity to marry him. She says no. Repeatedly.</p>
<p>Based on a fic prompt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Proposals and Identities

In the end, after numerous proposals and her objections to the idea, Felicity Smoak agrees to marry Oliver Queen.  
  
She didn’t say “no” to his proposal for the sake of saying no and playing hard to get. At first, she really believed that marriage was unnecessary, for her, anyway. A part of her didn’t want to be part of an institution that rewarded straight couples for being straight, and excluded couples that were not. And she really did not want to have a lavish wedding ceremony, even though Oliver’s regained fortune meant that she could have every woman’s dream wedding. In fact, one of the reasons why she didn’t want to get married to Oliver was that she didn’t want to take on the weight of being married to the Oliver Queen. She just knew that the media and blogosphere would pick apart all of their wedding day details, casting their judgey eyes on her and her supposed dream wedding day.  
  
The truth was, Felicity was never type of girl who dreamed about her wedding day, and didn’t grow up to be the woman that she was now with a picture in her head about what her ideal wedding day would be like. It just wasn’t something that occupied her waking and dreaming thoughts.   
  
She had other goals throughout her life: Get into MIT. Get out of Vegas. Get a job that honoured her hard academic work. Do her job well. Help Walter Steele with his mysterious notebook. Help find Walter Steele by being a part of the Hood’s team. Make sure that Oliver and Diggle (and whoever else guest-starred on their team) were able to their work safely and with all the technical support she could give. Save the city.   
  
Even when she and Oliver finally made it to each other, spending their days and nights together being in love and happy, the thought of marriage didn’t even cross her mind. It only did when Oliver asked her to marry him six months into their relationship.   
  
At that point, she added “It’s too soon” to her objections. So Oliver asked her again during their first year anniversary as a couple. She objected, but she agreed to move in with him.  But he asked again as they celebrated their new living arrangements a month later. She told him her objections again.  
  
It got to a point that he asked her every month for four consecutive months. On the fourth month, they had their biggest relationship-related fight ever.   
  
"Oliver, I don’t believe in marriage! Can’t you get that?" she had screamed, exasperated.   
  
"Why?" he pleaded.  
  
"I’ve told you time and time again why, Oliver! It’s just a piece of paper!"  
  
"So you don’t want to get married to me? Is that it, Felicity?" he said, hurt.  
  
"No! I don’t want to get married. Period," she explained, "I love you. I know you love me. I know we’re committed to each other. That’s all I need! I don’t need a piece of paper to show the world that we love each other and that we want to be together ‘til death do us part!"  
  
He was being so stubborn, she decided to turn the question around, “Why do you want to marry me?”  
  
"Because I love you. Because I want to be with you until the day one of us dies. Hell, even if you die before me, I’d still be with you," he said.  
  
"We don’t need to be married for that, Oliver," she insisted.  
  
"I know, Felicity," he said, "But I want to be formally, publicly, legally committed to you. I want you to be committed to be in the same way."  
  
"Oliver, you’ve given me powers of attorney over you and your company. I’ve given you the same powers over me. We share this building’s contract. Our names are in the legal registration documents for Q-Core. We’re already legally-bound. And we’ve made our relationship public. Everyone knows that we’re together. We’re together every day. We’re business partners. We’re Arrow partners. We’re lovers. How much more formality do you need?" she asked.  
  
"More," Oliver said.  
  
"Why? Don’t you trust me? Don’t you trust my commitment to you? Have I not shown you how committed I am to you and to our relationship? Or is it because you don’t trust yourself? Do you need to be legally-married to me in order to be committed and faithful to me? I don’t need that from you, Oliver."  
  
"I trust you! I know you’re committed to me. You don’t need to prove that. I know I will never be unfaithful to you, Felicity. I can’t imagine being with anyone else this way ever again," Oliver answered, "But I still want to be married to you, Felicity!"  
  
They were at an impasse. Both stubborn enough to hold their separate grounds on the topic, and to not give an inch.  
   
That night, Oliver, for the first and only time, opted to sleep in one of the guest rooms in their apartment instead of sleeping beside Felicity. That night was the only night they both chose to go to bed upset with each other.  
  
The next morning, after a long sleepless night, they apologised to each other. Oliver promised to stop proposing. But the kicked-puppy look on Oliver’s face and the hurt in his voice stayed with Felicity for days.   
  
It was in a conversation with John Diggle that Felicity gained some clarity and perspective. As per usual, the wise, emotionally-astute older man had the words that hit the nail on its head, “Felicity, I know that you don’t believe in marriage, and your reasons are valid, I’m not saying they are not. But ask yourself, are you being stubborn for the sake of being stubborn? Or are you being immovable on this because you have some un-confronted fears about the idea of marriage? Do you have fears about marrying Oliver? You say you’re already committed to Oliver — and I believe that you are — and I know for a fact that the two of you love each other in a way and with a passion that you’ve never loved anyone before. I’m not questioning your commitment, OK? But, if your committed to Oliver already, then what’s the hassle of spending one day in your life making Oliver happy by marrying him? If you want your wedding to be small and simple, you damn well that Oliver would not object.”  
  
He continued, “It’s different with Lyla and me. We both agreed to not get married again. We both agree that having children together is enough proof of our commitment. So we’re not getting married. But the moment Lyla starts thinking that she does want that ‘piece of paper’, that she does want that proof of our commitment, I’m not going to object to the idea because I am committed to her and her happiness. I expect that, if I’m the one who changes my mind about it, Lyla won’t object as well.”  
  
"In your case, Oliver wants this. I think, he needs it. You don’t, I know. But the idea has been raised, the question has been asked — repeatedly, I might add. But I know he’s vowed to never ask you again. He’s given in to your objections. But now, because he’s conceded, you need to give him an inch as well. It’s up to you to take the question seriously, consider it, and not dismiss it because the idea of it never occurred to you before. Or because you have prepared objections to the idea. I’m not saying you owe Oliver a ‘Yes’ but you do owe your relationship, yourself, and yes, Oliver, to properly and honestly consider the offer."  
  
With Digg’s words in mind, Felicity spends the next two, proposal-free months, thinking, considering. She makes lists of Pros and Cons. She confronts her fears about marriage. She goes through her objections one by one, and interrogates them. She does this all because she loves Oliver and she’s committed to his happiness, to their happiness. And she really really couldn’t get over the look on his face when he promised to never ask her hand in marriage again.  
  
At the end of her mulling-over process, she approaches Oliver, “I’ve been thinking about the idea of marrying you.”  
  
"Felicity, I’ve stopped proposing. I don’t want us to fight about it again," Oliver responds in surprise.   
  
They were in bed, settling in for the night. It had been another night of successful patrolling in Starling City, and they were both tired.  
  
"I know, Oliver. And thank you for not pressuring me about it anymore," she says, "I know it’s been hard for you to stop asking. And that it’s been hard for you to not badger me, Oliver. I want you to know that I appreciate your effort, and that I have been thinking about it."  
  
Oliver pulls her closer to him to press a kiss on her forehead, “Thank you. I appreciate that, Felicity.”  
  
"I love that you want to marry me, Oliver. I do. It’s just that the idea was never something I’ve ever had to think of before. Oh, I’ve considered marriage in a theoretical way. That’s how I came up with my reasons as to why I don’t believe in it. But I’ve never actually considered, up until two months ago, the idea of me being married. To you. Whenever you asked, I just went with my default, theoretical objections. I never thought about it in a personal way," she says, snuggling closer to him, "And I’m sorry that it took Digg pointing that out for me to properly and personally consider it."  
  
"And what did you conclude?" Oliver asks gently, stroking her hair and running his fingers through the strands.  
  
"I love you, Oliver. I love all of you. But I want to know, if you’re asking me to marry because you don’t believe you and I can commit to each other without it," Felicity says, a hand gently caressing his stubbled jaw line, " I know how I feel about this, but I want to know why you want to marry me."  
  
Oliver is quiet for a long time, preparing words, gathering his thoughts.  
  
"As the Arrow, I am very sure that I am committed to you, Felicity. Because the Arrow is that kind of man. He would protect you with everything that’s available to him. Body, skills, all the arrows in the armory. And as the Arrow, I know I’m the kind of man that someone like you deserves. Because I’m a hero when I put on the hood. And you deserve a hero, Felicity," he starts, "As the Arrow, I won’t need to be legally-bound to you. Heck, I can’t be legally-bound to you because secret identity and I don’t think secret, illegal identities could marry the loves of their lives. No matter how much they may want to."  
  
Felicity chuckles in response but lets Oliver continue, “As Oliver Queen though, I can marry you. I want to marry you. But I don’t think I deserve to. Because Oliver Queen, to be honest, is a douche bag. I know you don’t think so, Felicity. I know that you don’t take my history as Oliver Queen against me, and that you don’t judge me for my actions as Oliver Queen. I know that! And I know I’ve changed. But I’m still learning to accept what I’m like as Oliver Queen. That someone like you could love someone like me. I think that’s why I’ve been pressuring you to marry me. Because, if Felicity Smoak marries Oliver Queen, then Oliver Queen would be someone that was worth something.”  
  
"Oh, Oliver … Digg’s right, it’s creepy when you speak about yourself in the third person," Felicity teases, then brings herself closer to him to kiss his lips. She turns serious, "I love the Arrow, you know. But I love Oliver Queen more. You know why? Because the Arrow is Oliver Queen. I’ve never seen you as separate entities, Oliver. I’ve only ever seen you as you. I love you. I love all of you."  
  
"I love you, too, Felicity," he says, leaning closer to kiss her.  
  
"I’m not finished," Felicity says, stopping him with a hand on his jaw. She knows that if he kisses her the way they both want him to, they’ll never finish this conversation. "But Oliver, you can’t base your value on whether or not, I marry you. Because you’re valuable on your own. You’re respected. You’re loved. You’re worthy. You’re a hero. You deserve all of these things. All on your own."  
  
"All right," Oliver smiles, "I’ll try to believe that, Felicity."  
  
"Good."  
  
"So, I guess you’re really not going to marry me then?" Oliver adds, moving their bodies so he could lay over her, leaning down for a passionate, toe-curling kiss.  
  
"Oh, I wouldn’t say that," Felicity says, smiling.  
  
Oliver pushes back, staring at her hopefully, “Felicity…”  
  
"You know, I’ve been thinking about your marriage proposals. I’ve been thinking about why I was so adamant against the idea. I came up with two reasons," Felicity says.  
  
"Which are?"  
  
"One is that I’m stubborn. When I make up my mind about something, I kind of refuse to change my mind about it. Marriage was something I’ve considered unnecessary for my existence. I really believe that, ultimately, it is just a piece of paper, Oliver. But then you asked, and I dismissed your question because I know I made up my mind about my opinion on marriage. That was a shitty thing to do to the man I love, you know. To automatically dismiss the idea that you were proposing without giving much thought to it. I’m really sorry, Oliver."  
  
"You’re forgiven. Although I wouldn’t mind you agreeing to marry me out of guilt. I will take you anyway I can, Felicity," Oliver responds, teasingly.  
  
She rolls her eyes at him, “The other reason is that, I’m afraid of what it means to be married to someone like you. I mean, you’re Oliver Queen, billionaire! Born with a platinum spoon! From the most prominent family in Starling City. I really don’t want to be lost in all of that, Oliver. I worry about how everyone will make our wedding day their business. By everyone, I mean strangers on the street, reading tabloid headlines about our wedding day. And then I realised, that’s nothing compared to what it will be like if I was Mrs. Queen. I’m afraid that Felicity Smoak will get lost in that identity.”  
  
"You know, it is creepy when someone talks in the first person," Oliver murmurs, nuzzling her hair.  
  
"Right?" Felicity grins.  
  
Oliver drops a kiss and a nibble on her hear, before he says, “I never realised that it would be such a pressure, Felicity. And I should have known that it could be. God knows I’ve faltered under the pressure of the Queen name myself. I want to tell you that there’s no way the woman I fell in love with, Felicity Megan Smoak, would ever get lost under her married name. That you’re too strong for that. And I believe that with all my heart. And I will try to show you that everyday, whether we’re married on or not. I will. But, it’s up to you, Felicity. You have to decide, if you want to be my wife.”  
  
"So what do we do, Oliver?"  
  
"I’ll keep asking, Felicity. And when you’re ready, you’ll say ‘yes’. Either way, I get to spend a life time with you. So I can wait," Oliver promises.  
  
Three years and four months — and twenty proposals — later, Felicity says ‘Yes’.

**Author's Note:**

> Original post: http://outoftheclosetshipper.tumblr.com/post/96775810373/yeiii-ok-so-the-idea-is-this-dialogue


End file.
